Some people believe in reincarnation while others believe that we’re going to heaven or hell, but I think the best way to experience life is to assume that this is all we have, and as a result, we should try our best to make it last as long as possible.
But that isn’t always as easy as it sounds; although the average life expectancy is increasing generation upon generation, the existence of delicious fatty foods and beautiful booze mean it’s harder and harder to maintain the discipline required for a long, fulfilling and healthy life.
Of course, your doctors will tell you that the key to living a long time is to diet effectively, drink in moderation, exercise regularly and get plenty of sleep, but those things all sound so… boring. If only there was another way to achieve longevity. One which didn’t require so much planning and effort.
To be honest, I’m still looking for a quick-fix solution to this age-old problem, and if you’re looking for one too, then it might be pertinent to follow the advice of Jessie Gallan. Although she died back in 2015, she did so as the official oldest woman in Scotland, and that’s got to count for quite a lot.
Now, when you hear stories of men and women living a long time, their secret is usually drinking a can of Diet Coke a day or anything else to do with dieting. Meaning their assertions have got to be taken with a huge pinch of salt. But as you can probably tell, Jessie Gallan wasn’t like those other women.
Speaking to news outlets at Crosby House care home in the Scottish city of Aberdeen, Jessie admitted that she did love a good bowl of porridge, but put her enduring longevity down to one thing, and one thing only. “My secret to a long life has been staying away from men,” Jessie revealed. “They’re just more trouble than they’re worth.”
Yes, you heard this very wise old lady right: stay away from the opposite sex, and you’ll probably live a lot longer!
Born in a tiny cottage in 1906, Jessie travelled all around Scotland, starting out as a housemaid for a wealthy businessman before moving to Aberdeen to become a waitress, where in her time she served both the Queen of England and the Queen Mother.
Although there was never a husband or children in Jessie’s life, that didn’t mean she was lonely. Staff at Crosby House where Jessie lived out her final days say she was an independent lady, but Gillian Bennett, a senior support worker at the home, also revealed that she wasn’t left wanting for company.
“Jessie is a lovely woman. She has got her best friend here, Sarah Jane, and they are always together. She likes her music and likes her exercise class and is a very independent person. She is always walking about.”
Well, folks, there you have it. Continue crunching that kale or working those weights, but if Jessie Gallan is onto something, maybe the key to a long and healthy life is deleting the dating apps, ditching those dithering doofuses and living life completely on your own terms. I don’t think a bowl of porridge would hurt, though.